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If I ever get married our children will be pillaged with endless cycles of dad jokes. *child yells for dad* 'yeah?' 'not you the other one!' *both answer* Which one?' 'The short one!' 'We're both short!' 'The twink-ier one!' 'We're both twinks!' 'Dad I don't care which dad I'm hungry!' 'Hi hungry we're dad!'

If I ever get married our children will be pillaged with endless cycles of dad jokes. *child yells for dad* 'yeah?' 'not you the other one!' *both answer* Which one?' 'The short one!' 'We're both short!' 'The twink-ier one!' 'We're both twinks!' 'Dad I don't care which dad I'm hungry!' 'Hi hungry we're dad!'

Seriously...

Seriously...

Hahaha this is exactly what I'm going to tell my child. Actually, no, they can be Republican if they want. We will have political debates at absolutely every single meal, but they can be Republican if they want.

Hahaha this is exactly what I'm going to tell my child. Actually, no, they can be Republican if they want. We will have political debates at absolutely every single meal, but they can be Republican if they want.

My name is Molly..... I'm gay...... my moms side of the family is catholic....

My name is Molly..... I'm gay...... my moms side of the family is catholic....

Balls of Nonchalant Steel...That's one way to put it. Something tells me that *this* man will NEVER be accused of having his balls reside in his wife's pocket! ♊️

This is what I’m talking about…

Balls of Nonchalant Steel...That's one way to put it. Something tells me that *this* man will NEVER be accused of having his balls reside in his wife's pocket! ♊️

You don't joke about marrying David Bowie. Fact.

You don't joke about marrying David Bowie. Fact.

These are gold. - 9GAG

These are gold.

These are gold. - 9GAG

Oh my god the Pan one is so true WE TAKE ACTION AND DO STUPID THINGS THINKING WERE HEROS (Im pan )

Oh my god the Pan one is so true WE TAKE ACTION AND DO STUPID THINGS THINKING WERE HEROS (Im pan )

I actually just had a very long conversation at work about the plural form of penis. And also the dude with two dicks.  Yeah, I'm going to go ahead and say I'm awkward and talk/joke a LOT about the penises.

I actually just had a very long conversation at work about the plural form of penis. And also the dude with two dicks. Yeah, I'm going to go ahead and say I'm awkward and talk/joke a LOT about the penises.

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