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I've been single so long I don't even remember how to be in a relationship..

Lmfao it hasn't been that long but the potential for it to be a looonnnggggg time is real!

Lol

No Partner? No Problem! 25 Funny Quotes about Being Single .

Yup

Not true with my wife. Just pissy, whiny bitches.

I  got about as much chance of getting in a relationship as that squirrel in ice age has of finally getting that nut.

Someone from Rogers, Ohio, US posted a whisper, which reads "I got about as much chance of getting in a relationship as that squirrel in ice age has of finally getting that nut.

Yup, most days it's less than one!!!

Fly, little fuck, fly.

When I see this, I just think of an extremely hot guy chained up in my basement to whom I would occasionally toss down a raw steak for him to eat...

Do you walk it? Do you bathe it? Do you have to walk it? What are my responsibilities as owner of Boyfriend?

Funny Pictures Of The Day - 40 Pics

Why do people ask, "How was work?work is work. I'd rather be drunk on a yacht being hand fed grapes by naked underwear models, but here I am.

joshshepherd88's photo on Instagram

Soooo fucking true, I can not be trusted. Rp from my girl 👈🏻she's a total bitch, you'll love her.

I love the nutella stage

Even though they're there too.

My happy place is my bitch cave

Sadly THIS IS SO TRUE!

Funny Single Quotes (The Single Life) - The BarnPrincess

Truth

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Truth

When I'm Mad...

I’M a lady But when I’m mad i’m an evil sadistic demon spawned bitch from Hell that’ll make you wish you were never Born. when I’m happy i Bake muffins and shit.

I don't want to look "pretty". I want to look otherworldly and vaguely threatening. #quote #words #fun

Mostly vaguely threatening.in an intellectual kind of way.

I have said this a million times before but I would rather be single and HAPPY than be in a relationship and not be happy. Single doesn't always mean lonely and relationships don't always mean happy. I would rather wait for someone worth my time, its way too valuable to waste on some loser!!!

teenagerposts

*sigh* forever alone.my life story!

Vulgar but funny! Lol!!!

Funny Quotes : QUOTATION - Image : Quotes about Fun - Description Work Quote : A good insult for plastic people.

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