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She wears short shorts....

Free and Funny News Ecard: I'm sorry, call me old fashioned, but I think shorts should be longer than your vagina.

I know two or three still with names and numbers still connected in my head. And one or two I'd have to dial and see who picks up.

Some eCards: I hope I never go to jail because I haven't memorized a phone number since 2001

my motto. Had to steal this from my girl @Lesley Howard I mean this is so me!

better late than ugly ;) actually I usually just arrive ugly since I hate being late!

My mom posted this with the caption "note to my daughter". She's pretty funny. And this is all too accurate. Hehe.

Olive Oil & Sea Salt-Garlic Popcorn

Funny Confession Ecard: Lord, grant me the serenity to accept stupid people the way they are, courage to maintain self-control, and wisdom to know if I act on it, I will go to jail! laughing out loud

Been there! #motherhood

It may require more than a hug, but at 26 I'm pretty sure my Mom can still fix everything

That awkward moment when your skinny friend says she feels fat and you're just standing there... all fat.

Funny Friendship Ecard: When your skinny friend says she feels fat and you're just standing there. all fat. I'm not fat but when my skinny friends say this.

Oh lord- this is every free minute at work (when there is a spare minute that is!)

Our 5 favorite nursing memes on Tumblr this week - May 29

Free and Funny Confession Ecard: That awkward moment when you're not sure if you actually have free time or if you're just forgetting everything.

Oh, you expected ME to keep in contact with YOU but not vice-versa? My bad, I forgot that's how friendship worked.

Unfortunately, this is true of a couple of 'friendships' I finally let go of. I felt like a needy street beggar every time I tried to contact them.

I've always said I refuse to date a woman that doesn't swear. You have 3 dates to utilize 'fuck' appropriately otherwise it's not going to work...

swearing is a great stress reliever, especially if you have a high stress job. I don't mean swearing at people.I mean random words pouring from your mouth while in friends company!

Dear Every Obnoxious Girl on Facebook...

anything you say can and will be held against you.-) I am still laughing outloud.

Oh my gosh, yes! I do this all the time and feel so bad if I forget to get one of my residents something! #alwaysacna #scrublife

Nursing Humor--but seriously! This happened all the time when I worked in the hospital!