Explore Winston Churchill, Churchill Quotes, and more!

Bahahaha!! So funny, but so wrong...

True Story: “Lady Nancy Astor: Winston, if you were my husband, I'd poison your tea. Winston Churchill: Nancy, if I were your husband, I'd drink it.

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder

Boy: "May I buy you a cocktail?" Girl: "Alcohol is bad for my legs." Boy: "Do they swell?" Girl: "No, they spread"

This is EXACTLY why Shawn & I get along...i have NO idea what he's saying and I keep agreeing!!

That's my life a lot of the time now that I live in Australia. All the Aussie accents are tough to understand at times.especially when they talk fast!

LOL don't we all!

Free and Funny Confession Ecard: Every time I get the urge to clean. I watch Hoarders. and I decide my house isn't that dirty after all!

5 Secrets to Fitting in with the Italian Locals - http://www.whataboutitaly.com/scoop-it/5-secrets-to-fitting-in-with-the-italian-locals/

biggest pet peeve when people interrupt the middle of your sentence.

Alison showed me just the top part and of course I did my best Joey impression. I laughed out loud when she scrolled down to the bottom.

How you doin’?

how you doin'?I totally did read it in my mind in the exact voice of Joey! Oh how I LOVE Friends!

@midnightlove09  reminds me of you

"When you wanna throat punch somebody, but you trying to get right with the Lord." This applies to my life.

this is my husband lol

"A husband is someone who, after taking the trash out, gives the impression he just cleaned the whole house." Although mine usually does clean the house too:)

Lmao all the time

Instagram Post by 'Vince (@suckmykicks)

I am doing my job and production scheduler job and working the customer/drivers that come for pick up! Yes- 3 people's job -crammed in a working period!


"The funeral director." Got this from a friend and thought now THIS is funny! Showed my honey, he thought it was pretty funny and agreed it would be the funeral director.

Gallery: 100 Hilarious E-Card Memes

Gallery: 100 Hilarious E-Card Memes

Im outdoorsy in that I like getting drunk on patios. erinmavrides Im outdoorsy in that I like getting drunk on patios. Im outdoorsy in that I like getting drunk on patios.

Let's bring some humor in with the power. Maxine allows herself the power to say exactly what she is thinking, and often what we are thinking too! I am offering her as role model for truth-telling, sometimes done with a touch of humor!

Maxine: "My idea of a Super Bowl is a toilet that cleans itself!

most depressing time in someones life...

Top 5 Funnies

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Hold tight to your memories

"Remember the day you brought me home and you were filled with joy? Go to that place because I just drew all over the walls and shaved the dog. Always remember the joy-filled days!